We all know the classic fantasy formula from games like Dragon Quest or movies like Shrek, but Crimen – Mercenary Tales on Meta Quest actually lets you step inside the fairy tale. Instead of just watching a cutscene, you high-five the narrator in a tavern and instantly become the protagonist of eight distinct, comic-book-style adventures. Featuring directional sword combat where you must physically read enemy guards, heavy climbing mechanics, and a hilarious, lighthearted tone, this story-driven VR slasher is packed with charm. Here is my honest breakdown of the combat loop, the sometimes-frustrating climbing sections, and why even fighting demons with a wooden stick feels incredibly heroic.
Game Introduction
You’ve seen Shrek, right? That big green ogre somehow ends up marrying a princess.
Those medieval-style fairy tales usually mix together warriors, princesses, witches, and monsters, and that’s what pushes the story forward.
And honestly, we’ve already played a lot of games like that. Take Dragon Quest, for example. It’s built on that exact kind of world. The hero sets out on a journey to defeat the Demon Lord. You start with a simple copper sword in your hand, fighting slimes one by one.
Now imagine stepping into a world like that yourself and actually walking around in it.
These days, most stories get told through movies, anime, or TV dramas. You sit there and watch. But in VR, you experience everything in first person, and it hits differently.
Crimen is a story-driven game. The moment you high-five a character, you start moving as the protagonist. You follow the main character’s journey, fight through battles, solve puzzles, and pull a legendary sword from a treasure chest.
Even if what you’re holding is just a wooden stick with a piece of poop stuck on the end, taking down enemies with it and going “ugh, that stinks” somehow makes it even funnier. That ridiculous kind of moment is part of the fun.
You get three save slots, and you can record your progress in any of them.
That means you can replay the game on a different difficulty or try out different kinds of challenges without wiping your original data.
But before you jump in, make sure you set the game language properly. There’s a settings panel on the left side of the lobby, and you can also press the menu button on your left Controller to open Settings.
In the General settings, set the subtitle language to English. Once you do that, you’ll be able to follow the story without any problems.
You don’t really need to adjust the button layout. The game mostly uses the Trigger and the Grip Button, so the controls stay simple.
The difficulty settings break down like this:
- Easy: For people who aren’t very used to VR games.
- Normal: For players who are already comfortable with VR.
- Hard: For people who seriously grind VR sword-fighting games.
I’m playing on Normal myself. But if you watch the footage and think, “That looks easy,” then go ahead and try Hard.
Once you pick your difficulty, that’s when the story introduction begins.
From there, you’ll experience all kinds of dramatic character arcs as you move through the game.
When the game starts, you suddenly spawn in a large courtyard. It’s got a calm, peaceful vibe. Then you notice a little boy waving at you, and right next to him there’s a small donkey.
The tavern is closed, but you can interact with the boy. If you give him a high five, he starts telling you the story. That high five is what triggers the beginning of the adventure.
After that, every time you continue playing, you don’t just pick a save slot. You also high-five the character you want to control. That’s how you confirm, “Alright, I’m following this character’s story.”
And just like that, it begins. Looks like you’ve stepped into the boy’s imaginary world.
It kind of reminds me of being a student, sitting in class and daydreaming about being the hero.
Alright, now it’s my turn to rescue that donkey.
See that huge hole in the castle wall? Yeah… looks like this is the boy’s secret base. Follow the tutorial and take a look inside.
The game world has a lot of interactive elements—stairs, walls, pillars, things like that. If something is highlighted in yellow, it usually means you can climb it.
This game leans pretty hard into realism. When you need to get somewhere high, you have to climb it yourself, one step at a time. There’s no teleport movement here.
On some stages, though, it can get seriously annoying. You’ll be halfway up a climb and suddenly drop straight down.
At that point you can’t help but think, “Wait, when did this turn into a climbing game?”
The view from the rooftop really opens up. It feels great standing up there.
If you head into the castle tower, that’s where your secret base is set up.
The graphics are surprisingly well done, too. Objects don’t look flat or paper-thin like in some other games. Everything feels properly built and solid.
Oh, a treasure chest. You open it up all excited, and inside there’s gold and silver… and wait, a wooden sword?
And the only thing you can actually pick up is the wooden sword. The shiny golden sword sitting right next to it? Untouchable. Seriously?
But to the boy, this wooden sword is a legendary weapon that can defeat demons and dragons.
Alright then. I guess I’ll just roll with that.
It was just a wooden sword a second ago, and now it’s suddenly turned into an iron longsword.
Guess that’s what imagination can do. With this thing, it actually feels like you could take down demons and dragons for real.
This contraption is called a “Jump Launcher,” or something like that.
You grab the rope, slash it clean, and then just zip straight upward.
Next up, the rope. You’re almost at that donkey.
Grab the Grip Button firmly, then just let gravity do the rest and slide down smoothly.
Draw the sword from your waist and slash the tree.
Just aim for the red-marked crack and strike there.
(Small spoiler… this same mechanic shows up again later during the Demon Lord fight, so keep it in mind.)
The tense battle music kicks in… time to fight.
The scarecrows in front of you turn into swordsmen, and now you have to face them head-on.
Attack with the longsword in your hand.
But pay attention to which direction your opponent is guarding. They can block in four directions—up, down, left, and right—so if you strike from the side they’re not covering, you’ll cut right through.
Looks like I’m stronger after all. That enemy went flying.
But don’t get careless. That was just one of them, and there are plenty more waiting.
Watch the direction of the enemy’s attack and block it with your sword.
Their movements are pretty similar across the board, so once you get used to it, you’ll start to read them and know which direction is coming next.
You’re surrounded. Basically Deadpool mode: “I’ll take all ten of you
Of course I’m going to win. I’ve got full main-character bonus on my side.
Of course, there’s a final boss waiting up ahead.
Take this strange creature, for example. It seems like she used to be a princess.
She suddenly bursts out of a coffin and appears right in front of you. When that happened, I honestly felt like my heart was going to jump out of my chest.
For a second, it felt like, “Wait… did this just turn into a horror game?”
As you push further in, you start running into orc-like half-beasts.
They even mix in feints with their attacks, and my HP got shredded fast. I was seriously close to going down.
Under the full moon, you face off against the Vampire Princess. Her attacks move with the elegance of blooming roses, and above you, the night sky stretches wide, the moon shining bright.
There are quite a few puzzle elements in the game, too.
For example, with this rotating disk mechanism, you actually have to study the surrounding pillars carefully and pick up on the clues to solve it.
For someone like me who isn’t exactly the sharpest when it comes to puzzles, it’s honestly a bit tough.
Alright, let’s get into it.
Go see for yourself what their story is really like.
Game Rating
The Highlights
- The story is genuinely fun, and there’s a good amount of interaction throughout.
- The controls stay simple. You can handle most fights with just two buttons.
- And if it feels too easy or too tough, you can always adjust the difficulty.
The Drawbacks
- It’s single-player only, so you can’t play it with friends.
- A lot of the fights feel similar, so you might start to feel a bit of repetition after a while.
- And you’ll need a fairly open play space around you.
Setup & Safety
You’ll be swinging your arms around pretty hard, so make sure you’re really aware of your surroundings.
Final Score & Comfort Level
Final Score: 🌟🌟🌟🌟 (Solid Choice)
VR Comfort Level: 🌀🌀🌀 (Moderate)
Video Overview
Meta Quest Official Information
Price: 14.99 USD
This game often goes on sale during seasonal events, Black Friday, and New Year promotions. The discount usually ranges somewhere between 40% and 90% off.
If you enter VRPUPU at checkout, you get another 10% off.
Rating: 4.2 / 5 ( 138 Reviews)
Official Description
Raise your glasses, crew. 🍺
Set out on a brutally bloody journey and experience eight rogue stories packed with lavish treasure and legendary feats.
Wield a variety of weapons based on real 17th-century history as you carve your way through grim castles, ancient temples, and forgotten shipwrecks, each one set in breathtaking locations.
The bold comic-style art stands out right away, and the tavern is filled with eccentric characters. They share humorous tales and wild stories of heroism that stick with you.
🤜 Features 🤛
A fast-paced, blood-splattered hack-and-slash arcade experience. It takes a different approach from physics-heavy VR combat.
Eight distinct characters, each telling their own unique adventure.
Bright, high-impact comic-style visuals.
Packed with humor, Easter eggs, and pop culture references.
100 unlockable achievements.
A wide range of weapons and settings inspired by real 17th-century Europe.
An atmospheric Slavic-inspired soundtrack composed by Arkadiusz Reikowski, adding even more personality to the experience.
If the brutal action of Crimen – Mercenary Tales still is not enough, there are plenty more VR action games waiting for you.
